Welcome to the crossroads of curiosity and creativity, where the larger questions of life are pondered, explored and expressed in textile art, sculpture, painting and prose.

8.02.2017

Same Rabbit, Deeper Hole

Detail image from The Dream Thief art-quilt
My last post addressed the concept of 'them' vs. 'us' and how that perceptual position sets me up for failure.  As long as I am running the 'them' vs. 'us' program, 'they' have me...or should I say I have me!  Caught up in yet another illusory tangle, I have halted further expansion of my awareness.  My spiritual awakening is spinning in circles and I am going nowhere fast....I say fast because there are more 'them' vs. 'us' scenarios 'out there' than anything! The only thing more distracting than that is the belief that there is a legitimate 'out there' in the first place!  

My own expansion of awareness is largely aided by introspection and creative energy as I tend to get prompts or nudges from an inner aspect while I work.  For the last few weeks a thought has been niggling at me the way these nudges tend to do.  The thought is...What if 'they' are actually aiding us rather than working against 'us' to destroy 'us'?  What if the end justifies the means?  What if at least some of those "secret" programs and those behind them that we "conspiracy theorists" have uncovered as covert operations are actually in place to serve humanity?  Hmmmm...

I have long been aware that at the very top of this wild spiritual projection of light into form (which is what this dimension is) there is only one!  And, tag....we're it...fractalized expressions of wholeness.  Therefore, it stands to reason that at the highest perspective, we are both the 'them' and 'us'!  We are literally shaking ourselves awake from a dense, scary dream of form with an expertly designed individual and collective feedback loop disguised as 'them' vs. 'us'...disguised as 'out there'?  The 'them' 'out there' is like a physical feed-back-loop reflection of what we need to experience, perfectly paraphrased (based on our most current expression) to show us who and where we are spiritually, so that we can make the next 'right' decision to further our individual and collective expansion.  Ok...that's a mouthful, but stay with me here.

I'm not spouting some esoteric, religious based philosophy, though aspects of this are threaded through many such teachings.  I am however suggesting that if I begin to look at everything around me, every situation and experience as an opportunity to see a 'paraphrased reflection' of me and thus respond or react differently....say with compassion and awareness of the WHOLEness that I actually am, might my experiences and my awareness shift dramatically?

I come from a decades old practice of not making the reflection/dream/illusory world 'real'.  Seeing it for what it is and responding through the spiritual perspective of non-attachment.  This has worked wonders in fostering my awakening.  If however I see everything as some aspect of myself, loving me enough to express whatever darkness it needs to express, in whatever manner it deems necessary in order to show me my lack of awareness, then what happens if I respond differently to it?  I don't know, but this idea invites a huge shift.  

Imagine gratitude for the elite families and the secret programs that have oppressed and abused humanity for eons... not for gain, but in hopes that we might one day step into our sovereignty and raise the consciousness of this realm to such a degree that we all, the whole of us transcend the entrapment we have unknowingly imposed in an effort to stir ourselves awake.  For me it's an idea worth playing with.  It's a track I am willing to explore.  If only in theory, if only in a perceptual sense, if I see everything around me as an expression from me, for me, for the purpose of feeding back to myself an opportunity to know myself on a larger scale by responding differently, what change may come?  What expansion might I then experience?  If I see that the 'good' guys and the 'evil'-doers are in on this whole thing together, how might that shift my awareness. How might that expand my consciousness?  

Might the game change incredibly if I am to sharpen my skills enough to recognize who is playing the role of the trickster or the destroyer?  Then, rather than project my unwanted darkness back on them, I simply say...I see you, and I refuse to lose myself on a bunny trail by buying into your role!  In not raging or warring against 'them' but choosing instead to expose/pull the mask off of them so that all can see the game being played in order to shake ourself awake, are't my energies better spent? If, in my role as the exposer, I express compassion instead of hatred for the nasty role they played how might that effect me?  How might that expand my heart?  These are ideas I am going to play with as I continue to dive into the depths of the 'evil-doers' and their role in this third dimensional, holographic construct most call reality.  At the very least I will be creatively inspired, and that always leads me to a new level of personal expansion and awareness.

7.25.2017

The Dream Thief

Design wall (detail image), The Dream Thief.  A new art-quilt underway.
Here is a detail image from a new art-quilt I have underway.  This piece is titled The Dream Thief and it speaks to the bunny trails and rabbit holes that swirl around the 'awakening' community as we explore this dream we call life.  Mainstreamers call us conspiracy theorists, alt-reality junkies, etc.  In truth, most folks simply call us nuts, but it's okay...cause we get why this is.  Most folks simply can't see what we see. Largely because they don't look where we look, but that's another story.  We know that it's just not their time...and we are mostly cool with that.  We also know that we are the mystics, the seekers, the enlightened, or as I like to think of us...the awakening minority.  

This 'awakening minority' is simply a group within the larger society that is focused differently.  We are 'focused on'/'paying attention to' an aspect of this 'dream we call life' from a different vantage point.  We therefore experience this illusory/holographic/simulation/construct which most call reality, quite differently! Rather than focused only in the mainstream perspective that we are all conditioned/programmed to see, we 'awoke' to a larger perspective. It's an unavoidable awakening.  It's just that some come to it earlier than others.  That's us.  And we are no better or worse than those with limited perspectives. We were each part of that group until this awakening hit us...like a ton of bricks, in some cases. But, as they say...somebody has to do it, and I am a part of those 'doing it'.  Doing what, you ask?  That hundredth monkey thing!  You know, effecting the collective consciousness by focusing our individual consciousness away from the programming. If anyone ever asks...that's what I truly do 'for a living'!  Your welcome!  And I can say that because my own gratitude goes out to those who did this long before I did so that I could eventually join in. It's the most fulfilling role I have ever played in this matrix game of life. 

Within this, 'awakening minority' however, we are not all alike.  We are not all focused on the same thing and even where we are, we have many different perceptions.  Lumping us all together is only easy for those within the mainstream collective.  That is one of the way's you know who is still operating largely from their conditioning/programming.  They lump us 'weirdos' all together.  Those in the awakening minority see our subtle differences.  We also see the trolls or operatives who pretend to be us so that they can disrupt the inevitable awakening we are all moving toward.  We are okay with these guys too....well, not exactly o-kay with them, but we 'get' it.  It is their job.  (And, hint-hint, mainstreamers are the reason their jobs exist....which is to act outrageous as they appear to be us in order to keep you from listening...and waking up too!) But we know they are the highly controlled/programmed within the mainstream machine.  And this mainstream machine is terribly afraid of this awakening.  But back to The Dream Thief and my inspiration for this new art-quilt.

In my own awakening I have personally come to realize that the further anyone moves away from a 'them vs. us' mentality the more awake they become.  And unfortunately, like the larger aspect of society, the 'awakening minority' is steeped in a them vs. us mentality!  We just have different them's and us's.  So much so that it doesn't even matter that we can see beyond the mainstream conditioning/programming.  We in the awakening minority know that politics, religion, media, finance, education, law, military, and the corporate arena are completely co-opted.  Mainstreamers don't really get this or they'd unplug like we have.  But, as long as anyone...anyone... is caught in a 'them vs. us' trap...they are trapped!  It matters little if one is trapped in a different level of consciousness than most...trapped is trapped.  If you are out to 'get', 'bring down', 'destroy', or 'stop' anyone with malice or contempt in your heart you are lost in a good vs. evil script and you are trapped.  If you want 'them' to "get what's coming to them", you are trapped.  If you take pride in a 'warrior' stance you are trapped.  If, on the other hand, you recognize these lower vibrational aspects and do nothing to address them, you are also trapped.  Avoid the trap!  How, you ask?  Well, here is the way I play it...

The two biggest reasons I see for this 'them vs. us' trap, no matter what level of consciousness I have attained, is 1.) My belief in the reality of 'form' itself, as life.  Form is not life!  And 2.) the idea that I need anyone else to change in order to effect my own liberation.  Any belief structure that reinforces the idea that matter ultimately matters can easily land me in a them vs. us mentality.  And anytime I think I need to convince anyone other than myself of something in order to expand my awareness/escape the matrix or facilitate further awakening, I am halting my own awakening.  

All form/matter/density is an 'experience' I engage with consciously which in turn affects my spiritual essence.  That's it! It is not who I am!  My body (for example) is not me any more than anyone else's body is them.  We are infinite, eternal is-ness that was never created and can never be destroyed!  We are spirit itself!  However, in this physical expression, my body as well as anyone else's is an opportunity for the real me (spiritual essence) to engage consciously with form/matter in as highly a conscious manner as possible!  This, and this alone is a perspective that, when applied to all form/matter, serves me (and my ongoing awakening) best.  Therefore, I attempt to remember this and treat all form/matter respectfully and consciously.  This advances me as an individual regardless if anyone else 'gets' this or not!  At least this is how I play the game.  It works for me and has continually advanced and awakened me in ways I could never have imagined.  

I don't worry about being fooled by others playing the game of life differently than I play it. I don't worry about falling for some 'conspiracy theory' that turned out to be foolishness.  It's all foolishness- this experience is the fool's journey!  That's what we are here to do.... And I certainly don't worry about the fate of those deliberately causing harm to the dream/illusion/hologram/simulation/construct we call 'reality'.  I treat them with the highest level of consciousness as well!  That, in my case, means exposing what I see as I see it, calling it for what it is and acting accordingly in the highest level of consciousness awareness I have.  If that means assisting in putting them in a position to not do harm then I participate in that without malice!!!  And with compassion!!!  It is foolish to think that compassion stops us from appropriate action.  This way of being/living has afforded me what I consider to be the most valuable aspect in this 'game of life'....an ever expanding freedom from fear.

I believe freedom from fear is the end game.  When we have mastered freedom from fear we are enlightened/awakened/alive! With freedom from fear we no longer see a 'them vs. us' world...because we get that it's all us! So we treat them and us with integrity, discernment, compassion and responsibility!   Fear is mastered when one completely realizes they can never be destroyed.  When I embraced my eternal nature and saw that I was not this limited body consciousness, I was free to play in the matrix in any way I desired and in so doing expand my freedom from fear.  My favorite game is the expansion of personal awareness, which undoes fear.  I love undoing my fear! I do this primarily through creative energy and exposing myself to the advanced awareness of others. I take in their awareness, run it past my own, keep what sticks and let the rest go.  It works for me.  Find what works for you....and don't let  the 'them vs. us' trap steal your dream!  

6.11.2017

In Memoriam



This art quilt is titled In Memoriam
Though just recently quilted, this art quilt imagery was created the year following the loss of my father and my husband who passed away within a day of one another four years ago. Working on this piece was my way of expressing and processing the loss of the two most important men in my life.  The gray pallet that the woman figure is cast in frames the two colorful roses which represent the lives of these men that I so loved.  The sadness in the figures eyes reflects the simultaneous widowhood my mother and I found ourselves sharing.  

 

Creative energy is a great vehicle for processing deeply held thoughts and emotions.  I have always used creativity to explore and express my life.  It seemed only fitting to create a tribute piece to memorialize these beloved men.  This piece hangs in my studio and each time I see it I feel surrounded by the supportive and loving energy of my father, my late husband and my mother. 

5.24.2017

Key To Awareness

Art quilt 30"x30" Key To Awareness
I decided to add a simple black border to this piece.  The previous post, Works In Progress, shares the inspiration for it and my thoughts on the subject of true awareness.....(balanced awakening at the level of heart, mind and will!).  I like the way this piece turned out and it was fun to mix fused collage work with drawing directly on the fabric. I also like the way the fractured, mosaic-like background (upper) dissolved into a less rigid and more organic free-floating background (lower).  This adds to the message that 'becoming aware' is a process that differs greatly from learning.  Anyway, I'm already back in the studio working on some new pieces and moving in a completely different direction inspired by Japanese Boro work.   We are off to Chicago soon and I wanted to take some hand work to do on the drive so I have put a few pieces together to stitch on. Just wanted to post this finished piece before we leave.   

5.16.2017

Works In Progress

Key To Awareness. This work in progress will be an art-quilt speaking to awakening at the level of heart, mind and will for  achieving balanced awareness.


We are all works in progress. Because I use the creative process to explore my shifts in consciousness and express my own levels of awareness, I thought I'd post what's unfolding on my design wall right now.  This work in progress, once completed, will speak to true awareness, which arises from awakening at the levels of heart, mind and will!  I have learned that until one is awakened at all three levels, imbalance is demonstrated in a variety of ways. When these 'ways' show up in political arenas we call people bleeding heart liberals, fundamentalist conservatives, religious fanatics, headstrong rebels or strong willed activists.   Rather than moving in true awareness, individuals are often caught up and acting on this or that belief; a word which at it's etymological root means 'unknown'.  Once truly awake, wide awake, on all three levels awareness ensues and peace prevails....first within the individual, and thereby eventually in the collective. Harmony, cooperation and creativity in every arena abounds.  This is because through balanced awareness, the heart leads the mind which then formulates and carries out the thoughts and ideas that guide one's personal will (actions). Unless awakened at all three levels chaos leads the way...for the individual, and thereby the collective. As I look around the world today I see this imbalance reflected 'out there' and so I seek the source of it within me....and heal it there. This is the gift awareness brings.  It doesn't allow me to strike out at the reflection or believe it to be any more than a reflection. 

Awareness is huge! It is so much bigger than the knowing that comes from learning, assessing, thinking or believing. For decades I have shaped my spirituality around the practice of reaching for ever higher levels of awareness.  I turn over every rock I am guided to explore in order to undo a belief or shift a perspective. Uncommon, unpopular rocks, even rocks considered ridiculous are continuously crossing my path providing incredible insight. Through this practice I have come to realize that when I awaken from everything I think I know, I will only be at the beginning of complete awareness.  Fortunately the process itself deepens my peace and moves me into more and more love as it alters my personal experience of 'reality'.

We are all less than fully awake at one level or another.  It has never been more demonstrated than in our world today; a world desperately out of balance.  As I reach for my own balance,  art is my activism. This work in progress is the sign I metaphorically carry. It is not against anything...it is however for us all! 

5.06.2017

Introspective Perspective


We live in a fluid experience, not a "linear reality".  Once one understands that, deep down in their bones, they can play in the experience, revel in it and truly enjoy it.  They are free from being shaped by it or victimized by it.  Until then they will just keep pointing 'out there' and complaining about what's wrong.  This is both a collective and individual truth.  I, for one, work on the individual level and then share what I find with the collective. I do both through my art and writing.  The collective can respond or not. Either way, I move toward an experience I prefer.  No one taught me this. I didn't find it in a book, a classroom or in some deep state of meditation.   I found it from not doing this and realizing that didn't work out so well.  So... more than three decades ago I stopped looking and pointing 'out' and started seriously looking and pointing 'in', then deeply exploring what I found there.  This is the way I do life...and I love it!  How do you do life?

4.23.2017

This New Blog and My New Name

Something Fishy: hand-painted, whole-cloth art quilt
If this piece looks familiar, that's because this image is used in the header from my original blog.  I always struggled with that blog because of my decision to share my artwork without sharing the fullness of the places my artwork sprang from. This rendered me a little schizophrenic each time I sat down to post.  My love for the role creative energy plays in my expansion experiences, the synchronicity and intuitive nudges that shape my life, and the rabbit holes that have awakened me have become more and more reflective in my artwork.....and I'd really love sharing more about how that unfolds!

As for my new name....  When I married last year I changed my last name to Harmon.  An amazing artist in his own right, My new husband, Mike has called me Storey since we met four years ago, so it felt really natural to go from Susan Storey to Storey Harmon.  I love the way this honors my late husband, Phil.  He brought so much to my life and supported my art career whole-heartedly.   Since that blog was under my previous name, and I have also changed my website url to storeyharmon.com, (which now includes Mike's amazing sculptures), a new blog seemed a good idea as well.  Add that to the fact that we are renovating a new live/work studio in a new town and well...welcome to my new life!